Meeting a Guru

Had been at Delhi Railway station in morning yesterday, with the intention to catch Avadh-Aasaam for some onward journey. Found it so packed that getting inside even without my luggage had been a gruelling task. I dropped the idea later, as if I could get inside somehow, next couple of hours of journey would pass on standing in tight bin-packing (have had experience of such journey in past, longest being once on pune-delhi route for around 18-20 hours. Moreover it didn't make much sense to try this adventure when bus service to desired place was available almost every 15 minutes, though that takes around 1.5-2 hours more and even more if one ends up in traffic jam on highway.

So I stood there on platform for next 10-15 minutes, seeing the train depart slowly, with some mixed feelings inside, wondering why did I waste time to come to railway station and bought the train ticket (that I could cancel with minor cancellation charge), by now it would have been around an hour's journey on bus.

While I turned back to walk towards the platform exit, I saw a woman dressed in almost black clothes (black from dirt, oil etc.) and unwashed, dirtful hair and body, carrying something very softly in her hands and walking as if nothing mattered. I realised that I knew what she was carrying with 'sahaj bhaav', before some policemen nearby started discussing about it within themselves. It was human shit that as per these policemen 'pagli' was carrying to eat??? When I heard the words I realised what I had realised that I knew.

Normally seeing shit around made me quite uncomfortable in childhood, and seeing it on railway tracks I also have felt like coughing, spitting, moving away from site, and yet I was here standing and watching her walk on platform with no feelings. Those 30-60 seconds (frankly speaking I didn't have any idea of how long it had been, as it looked a big deal of time) I felt I was able to see things as it is, without any biases or preconceived or picked-up-from-environment-and-education notions. I wondered why this strange feeling/behaviour I had with respect to human and dog/cat shit? Cow/bufallow, horse, goat, birds etc. shit didn't evoke those strange feelings inside me? And cow/bufallow shit I have even hold in my hands and made 'upale' and designs out of it for a garland used for offering to fire during HOLI. Some fed-in notions since childhood perhaps that cow shit is pious and others not.

When I came out of my state of realisation, I walked towards exit, but something had changed me by then, looking at human shit on railway track didn't have that earlier strength of strange feelings.
I knew the answer now - why had I come to railway station first instead of going to bus station directly.